How far would you go?

[Spydeyrch]

I didn't get to go down the Colorado, just the wife. We have another permit coming up this up coming spring, and yet again, it looks like I will miss out on the trip, and she will get to go with our friends. We have a great group of people we boat with.

I was supposed to be on the trip, but its such a time commitment, I am currently layed off, and when I pick up a new job, there will be no way I can request 3 weeks off with less than a year tenure.

That sucks that you won't be able to go again. But sweet for her to be able to go!! :clap:

Yeah, I could understand that fact that get employment and asking for 3 weeks off would be kind of ....... uummmm ....... not very profesional. Nice call on sticking with the employment part.

-Spydey

 

[Spydeyrch]

Spydey, you always seem to come up with the hot topic at the right time. :lol: I married a woman who was the daughter of a beef rancher but lived in town and doesn't even know how to ride a horse! I didn't ever consider what her interests were when I got married because I loved her not what she did. She has learned to accept me for who I am and I accept her for who she is. We (together) have a very different perspective on life than most people because unlike most marriages there was no "until death do you part" clause in the ceremony. Our marriage is "For time and all eternity". Family is everything to us and we live for that and always will. Now that our kids are grown and gone we vacation to see them and I get to fish along the way. I could not have a more supportive wife if God created one just for me (He did!) because we both want each other to be happy. How many of you hear your wife say, "I think you should go fishing tomorrow"? I get that all the time now, even though I only go once a week or less. Yes, she has had 39 years to get use to my addiction but has learned that I come home a better husband and father when I spend time on the water fishing.

As for putting fishing before spouse or kids. It only happened when I was young and stupid! I have spent years where I never even considered fishing and thought the best thing in life was seeing my daughter play T-ball and it was!

A little advise to a long and happy marriage...... She is always RIGHT, Never go to sleep angry at each other and most importantly..... Divorce is not an option!

GD

Wise words there GDB. Wise words indeed. Right now my little 3 year old is getting into painting, drawing, clothes, gymnastics, etc. I love going and watching her. I am proud of my son (5 years old) for the things that he shares with us once he gets home from school. Those things I would miss if I was out fishing on more than I currently do.

Yet, I do see the importance of having my alone time. Every time I go fishing, during the drive, the hike, etc, it gives me time to think about past events in my life, marriage, fatherhood, etc. I can see where I have not done as well as I could have and the results thereof. It allows me time to clear my head from work, church, family, etc. It allows me to reflect and propose to do better. To resolve for when I get home, to be better than I was yesterday. And there are times when I am hiking and just start laughing because I remember something that I did for my family that really brightened their day.

I love fishing but at the end of the day, I can't wait to see their beaming faces again. I love coming home and having my little girl wrap her little body around my leg and hug me. She sits down on my foot and wants me to carry her around as I walk. She loves it.

Being away from my family while I fish, hike, camp, etc, brings into perspective a lot of things. And it helps me to cherish those fleeting moments when I am with them and makes me long for more of them. It helps me appreciate what my wife does for our family and how much my kids look up to me.

So I need fishing/outdoors to become a better husband/father.

Well phrased GDB. Thanks for your words of insight. They are very much appreciated.

-Spydey

 

[Spydeyrch]

o sure you can just say that on interview. you need ever friday off paid. and all of oct off and 3 weeks for a raft trip

Ya know, I bet that he would get the time off that he requests during the interview........ :think: Granted he woulnd't get the job but that would allow for the time that he needs for those activites, right. :lol: hahahahahahaha :lol:

-Spydey

 

[alseaalumaweld]

if they wont let you have the time off you dont need to work for them

 

[eggs]

I married a city girl from a far far away land... turned(still working on it) her country and she enjoys camping/fishing/hiking almost as much as i do. She would never give me "fish/camp/outdoors or me" we went down a road much like that early in our relationship and learned it doesn't work.. but if that did happen i would take my family then just find a different hobby... until she realized you can not change who someone is and she married me "as is" and changing me wont last long. i guess i just found someone that enjoys me and my hobbies. you just have to give as well and take a day away from the river to do something she wants or enjoys. being in a family is a 2 way street, 1 way will never work.

 

[DYJ]

My wife and I were together for 5 years before I popped the question. She knew that I was a very active guy. I love to fish. I have a Jeep that is strictly a off road toy and it takes up a lot of time. I also ride a Harley and so does my father so we are always planning weekend trips. On top of all that we both work close to 50 hours a week

I deffinatly try to cram more into the time off I do have, then she does. But she knew all this before we got married. If she didn't deal with it very well I wouldn't have asked her or she probably wouldn't have said yes. I have dated girls in the past that couldn't help but feel like they had to compete with my toys and hobbies for my free time.... and there was probably a couple good ones that left for that reason. But I think life is to short to not be happy tryin to make someone else happy. It's all about give and take... I don't fish on her birthday, and she doesn't freek out when I come home late cause the salmon are biting.

 

[fishtales]

Perhaps I should have labeled this thread as:

Would you be willing?

or maybe

Who's comes first?

And perhaps this thread should be in the "non-fishing related" section. But then again it does have to deal slightly with fishing, so I will let the mods make that decision.

This thread came about because I was talking to some friends about their hobbies and the topic came up that some of them have had issues with their significant other due to their hobbies.

At one point one of them was on the verge of losing their spouse due to a pending divorce.

And I got to thinking, would I put fishing, or any hobby for that matter, before my spouse/family?

Up to what point would I say fishing comes first, or the wife/kids come first?

Would I even let it get as far as to have divorce mentioned in conversation due to my fishing "hobbie"? (it really is an addiction but I don't like to admit it :lol: )

I hope that it would never get to that point. So I decided that if I had to chose between my wife and my hobbies, she/they would win every time. Fish come and go. But my wife is my wife and my kids are mine and they are more important to me than any fish I will ever catch.

What about you all?

To what point would you let fishing interfere with your relationship with your significant other? Perhaps interfere isn't the best word. Because the majority of time it isn't interfering. But a lot of time, for a lot of us, it does take a priority over other things.

What do you think? Would you be willing to lose an important person just for fishing?

I have known of people that have put fishing away for years, maybe even decades, because their family needed them. They were able to pick it up again later. But think of all the things they would have missed with their family had they continued to fish instead of focusing on their family?

What are your thoughts and opinions? I am curious to see what others thing. And if you have any personal experiences that you feel comfortable sharing, I would love to hear (read) about them.

Take care all.

-Spydey

I would not let Fishing get in the way of the relationship but crabbing maybe

 

[C_Run]

Fishing, hunting, rafting, outdoors. Thats what I work and live for. I am married, and do the previously stated, 3, 4, and 5 days a week. Sometimes more. If I didn't have a compatable wife for the things I love to do, then I wouldnt be married. No questions. Your spouse needs to like you for who you are, no strings attatched. And if you love fishing, then thats who you are...

RWS, I would have sworn you had a trust fund. When do you have time to work? "Happy wife, happy life" I always say.

 

[OnTheFly]

Got a new fishing pole for my wife..........nice trade huh.

 

[Spydeyrch]

Got a new fishing pole for my wife..........nice trade huh.

Nice!!! Sweet way to line the pot, right!! hahaha :lol:

And yes, I do like that trade. hahahaha

-Spydey

 

[alseaalumaweld]

Got a new fishing pole for my wife..........nice trade huh.

best one you could make

 

[Mad dog]

My wife and I went on our first date on a hike in fishing trip to the Klamath river canyon! She wanted to go fishing and I took her....now she makes a lot of money and can't get rid of me!!! :lol:

 

[RunWithSasquatch]

now she makes a lot of money and can't get rid of me!!! :lol:

Atta boy.... Great example of how-its-done!

 

[alseaalumaweld]

where do you find them at?

 

[JeannaJigs]

Ahhh already went down the route of marrying someone that HATES fishing, but wouldn't let me go fishing with anyone else...never again. Divorce is expensive. There were other factors involved but I didn't go fishing once for about a year and it made me almost insane, so no I wouldn't give it up again for someone else. It's absolutely essential to share common interests, especially when you spend a lot of time on the water.

 

[lilsalmon]

I hear ya Jeanna....I was in a 19 year marriage and he was a home body...we lived 8 years in Montana and never fished........he was really controlling and one day I finally said "I am done" and moved here to Oregon. Now he says how come you never fished and camped with me? I tell him I found better company......

 

[alseaalumaweld]

I found better company hahaha

 

[GDBrown]

I hear ya Jeanna....I was in a 19 year marriage and he was a home body...we lived 8 years in Montana and never fished........he was really controlling and one day I finally said "I am done" and moved here to Oregon. Now he says how come you never fished and camped with me? I tell him I found better company......

I will accept that as a compliment for all us OFFers who have spent time on the water with you! Thank you very much.
The "LBDrifter" is looking better every day now.

GD

 

[lilsalmon]

I will accept that as a compliment for all us OFFers who have spent time on the water with you! Thank you very much.
The "LBDrifter" is looking better every day now.

GD

Definitely a compliment.....I have had a lot of great times with a lot of fisherpeoples here and its all good. Good friends and good times. Can't wait to see pics of LBD all spiffed up again.

 

[lilsalmon]

I found better company hahaha